Things Kids Say: My Favorite Milk

So, Baby Girl is some sort of ninja. We knew the girl had skills, but didn’t quite realize the extent of those skills until the recent bout of sickness.

That’s right, I said sickness. Again. (Again. Again. Again. Because one “again” doesn’t cover it. At this point, I understand if you “X” out your browser tab for this post, since so many of my posts have been about sickness this year.)

Little Man got sick on Monday with what appeared to be the flu. He had the same symptoms as Norah did in January, plus there is an outbreak in our area. Luckily, we had the extra Tamiflu our doctor gave us back then, so we gave him that, and three days later, he was good to go back to school.

We thought we’d be safe with Baby Girl, since she had it before. Immunity or some crap, right? Obviously I either don’t know how things works or she was unlucky or something. Either way, she came down with the same symptoms on Wednesday. But she wouldn’t take her medicine.

“No, I not take that medicine. I not like it,” she told us. “No thank you!”

Fine. We’d be sneaky and put it in her drink.

We gave her some lactose-free milk. “No, not that milk. I want my milk. I not drink that. No thank you.” She hadn’t even tasted it, nor was she in the kitchen when we made it. She just knew.

We tried it with juice. We tried with a Tum-E-Yummy. We tried mixing it in ice cream. We tried soda. She wouldn’t go near any of it. Toddlers are apparently built with a radar than lets them know anytime an adult is trying to be sneaky about something they’re going to consume. It was frustrating, but I was also kinda impressed. And then we tried the same things again yesterday, without much luck at first.

“Baby Girl, if you don’t take your medicine, we’re going to have to take you to the doctor,” I told her.

“Okay!” she said brightly. “I get my ears checked and my pig’s ears checked.”

Really? She had a pretty high fever and had been lying in bed sleeping most of the day. Minutes before she could only muster up the strength to say “Hold, me Mommy” in the weakest voice ever, with her eyes closed. She was like dead weight when I picked her up, as apparently holding her arms around my neck while I carried her would have been too much physical exertion. And now she wants to get out and drive to see the doctor?

I sighed. “Maybe we’ll go tomorrow.”

We continued trying to get the medicine in her. At one point five drinks in five cups were spiked. (Don’t worry, we kept track of everything.) After more refusals, Sam finally put some medicine in whole milk (which she isn’t supposed to be drinking right now).

“Oh, it’s my favorite milk!” she said when she tasted it. And then she guzzled it down. Within the hour, her fever was down and she was running around the house fussing at Little Man for looking at her toys. Today she feels much better and has no fever, just still tired. It’s amazing how quickly kids can bounce back.


Here’s To A Less Busy Week

Super busy week is over, but not without another round of illness. (Seriously, wtf is wrong with my house? Do I need to start bathing everyone in Lysol?) A few hours after making my post about sicknesses, I went to pick up Little Man from school. He looked kinda pissed as he got in the car, so I figured he’d had a bad day. As soon as he closed the door, he said, “Mom, I feel like I’m gonna puke.”

Oh shit. “Okay, let me pull up–” and then he projectile vomited all over the car. The next few hours were rough, but fortunately it was just a 24-hour bug, and he didn’t miss out on any of his birthday festivities. Also, fortunately, no one else has gotten it yet.

Little Man’s birthday celebrations went well. He had lots of cake and got lots of nice gifts, so he was a happy boy. For those of you with younger kids — we found out that third grade is the age where parents drop off their kids and disappear for hours. Some of the parents didn’t even bother coming inside. Almost 20 wild kids and a bounce house for three hours — sweet baby Jesus, we needed some booze. Luckily my cousin, who happens to be a third grade teacher, showed up with her kiddos and helped out some.


I had the dreaded physical on Friday. Unfortunately, the doctor my family sees that we love left abruptly (family issues, we were told), so I had to see someone new. It went well, plus I found out that my cholesterol had dropped 40 points, plus I lost a little weight. I was thrilled with the cholesterol drop, down into the normal range now. That will definitely serve as motivation for improving my health in 2017. I also had an X-ray done for a nagging foot issue and found that the pain is because of a bone spur. Yuck!

Something else new in my household that isn’t health related — Baby Girl is now speaking in a British accent a lot. Her favorite new show is Peppa Pig (thanks a lot, MawMaw), and Peppa is a British show, in case you didn’t know. I swear she isn’t watching so much of it that it should be impacting her former country as hell Southern accent, but it is. It hasn’t helped that Sam and Little Man are encouraging her. So, now the little blonde headed girl that doesn’t look like she belongs to our family also doesn’t sound like she belongs with our family. I’m not traveling outside the country with her anytime soon, we’d probably be accused of kidnapping. 😉


Bad Timing, Virus

What do you get when you add a super busy week and a parent with a stomach bug together?

Nothing good!

I was in the city where I see my psychiatrist an hour away from home on Thursday when a wave of nausea hit me. I had left a store and was driving over when I began pouring sweat and feeling like I was about to puke, and then I did. Miracle of miracles, I had a bag next to me and didn’t destroy the car. I called my husband and asked him to reschedule and made the longest hour-long drive home ever.

(I’m kind of worried that I’ll still have a psychiatrist now, as I missed an appointment two weeks ago because my husband wrote down the wrong day when he called to reschedule it and then they didn’t answer when I tried to call on Thursday or Friday. They have a rule about missing two appointments and being dropped. I have no idea how strictly enforced that is, but hopefully they’ll cut me some slack.)

The next 48 hours were filled with nothing that you want to read about while zoning out browsing blogs. Hopefully no one else picks it up. Aside from not wanting people in my family to feel miserable, we’ve had puke every week since Christmas Day (which, admittedly, is only like three weeks, but feels more like three months), and it’d be nice to break that record we’re apparently going for. (On the plus side, I’ve lost 8 pounds since Thursday…all of that won’t stick, of course, but it’s still a nice silver lining until it goes away.)

On a brighter — and far less gross — note, Little Man won his school’s spelling bee last week! They had two kids from grades third through fifth, and it came down to the two third graders. He was so precious when he spelled the word for the championship. He got it right and was congratulated, and he gasped and said, “Oh my god, I won? I’ve never even been in a spelling be before and I won?!”

He will be in the district spelling bee next month, which will have him competing against kids through eighth grade! I was shocked that it wouldn’t be limited to elementary school, but hopefully he will do well. We saw a newspaper article online from last year’s district bee, and they mentioned the final eight words the last two standing had to spell, and he knew six of them. Fingers crossed!

Little Man had a science project due on Friday that he’s hoping he’ll place on (so, in between bouts of stuff you don’t want to read about, I was helping him get it put together and then found out that his project was actually due on Tuesday…sigh). He did a project on how different drinks can affect teeth using eggshells. He tested the pH level of the drinks and let it all soak for 24 hours to see which one deteriorated the eggshell the most, and (of course) my favorite — Coke — won. It was followed by wine and then coffee. It was his idea to include wine — “My favorite god is Dionysus, so we’ve gotta!” — and his teacher said some of the kids were freaking out, thinking that he actually drinks wine.

So, that’s my week. I hope y’all had a good one and will be making my way around your blogs to find out. 🙂

And Then There Was One

This past weekend I wrote about Sam getting the stomach bug that’s going around and Baby Girl getting Round 2 of it. She seemed okay on Sunday, but woke up on Monday feeling bad. Not only did she sleep two hours past her normal wake-up time, she acted so exhausted that she couldn’t hold her head up. She would sit up and them slump over. It was scary. That, combined with her starting puking again, a dry diaper (after sleeping 12 hours), and generally being unresponsive led to her going to the doctor.

We called the nurse line and they recommended calling 911 or taking her directly to the ER, but on the way to the hospital, she became more responsive and started chatting herself up in the little mirror that’s on the backseat, so we went to the Children’s Urgent Care instead. She was seen immediately and the NP said she was mildly dehydrated and had the stomach flu (Round 3), so she was given some Pedialyte. After waiting a while and seeing that she was able to hold it down and otherwise seemed okay, we left. By nighttime, she was back to her old self. It was crazy how she went from being that sick in the morning to running around the house squealing at night. Little Man never really got sick beyond getting croup a few times, so maybe that’s just par for the course with the little ones.

The bug didn’t stop there, though. I woke up in the middle of the night with the lovely throwing up and everything. So not fun. In between bouts of the not-fun-stuff, I slept most of Tuesday and a lot of Wednesday. I don’t think I’ve ever sleep that much in 48 hours in my life.

Today is better, thankfully! Now it’s time for catching up on the cleaning (apparently the house went into self-destruct mode during the two days I was sequestered in my room), laundry, grocery shopping, etc. Or maybe I’ll let the house remain in self-destruct mode, let the laundry continue piling up, and let everyone exist on diets of cereal and blueberries until tomorrow while I catch up on reading blogs. The first way might cause me to overexert myself, and heavens know I wouldn’t want to do that and risk a Round 2.

And now that leaves Little Man. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that he doesn’t get it. And that no one follows Baby Girl’s steps and gets a Round 2 and 3. And that she limits herself to three rounds. That’s not too much to ask for, right?

Weekend Coffee Share: More Puking, Testing, And Four-Letter Words


Hello, coffee drinkers! Remember how you wanted to stay away from my house last week because Baby Girl had a stomach bug and was all pukey? Well, you’ll also want to stay away this week, as Sam got it. [And then, as I was in the middle of writing this post, BG woke up from her nap puking all over. Here goes Round 2.] So far Little Man and I have managed to stay bug-free.

Sam felt rough as hell for a couple days, but has been gloating about how it has put him ahead of me for our Weight Loss Challenge, so don’t feel too bad for him. He’ll get that tattoo, by God. Especially since he went to a Chinese buffet tonight and got himself a huge container of food. Eat that fried rice, Sam, eat that rice.

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Next week Little Man has his appointment to be screened for a sensory processing disorder. I’m not sure what all that will entail, but hopefully that will get us one step closer to figuring things out for him. After that, he should be screened for ADHD back at the Pediatric Behavioral Health place. Too bad they couldn’t do it all at the same place — we would probably be wrapped up by now, but it is what it is.

He’s still doing well at school. The accommodations his teacher made for him are still helping. I’ve said it before and will say it again — thank God for good teachers!

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If we were having coffee, I’d also tell you that I taught Baby Girl a new word today: butt. Whenever she has a poopy diaper, which is probably four times per day, I comment that she has a “stinky butt.” I made that comment again today when it was time to change her, and just as Sam was walking out of the room, she shouted, “butt, butt, butt!” I thought it was hilarious, but he wasn’t as amused at her using her first sorta four letter word. 😉

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That’s all I’ve got for now, since this has been a mostly uneventful week. And by uneventful, I mean “lazy.” I hope y’all have had a good week!

Weekend Coffee Share is hosted by Diana at Part-Time Monster.