I’ve seen a couple other posters do this survey, so I’m down. You can read their answers at Twin Daddy Blog and Joeyfully Stated.
Now, I’m sure with the other survey type things I’ve posted, y’all probably think you know me. Maybe you think you know me better than you’d like, even. If you aren’t at that point yet, you will be by the end of this survey.
1 – Boxer shorts or budgy smugglers? Boxer shorts FTW. I love wearing my husband’s.
2 – What color of underwear are you currently wearing? White. Because I’m boring.
3 – How long have you been wearing them for? Since this afternoon when I decided I should put on underwear if we’re going to town.
4 – Do you ever use binoculars to watch people? Hell no. I avoid looking at people when possible. My grandmother was known to use both binoculars and a telescope to attempt to spy on our neighbors. (In her defense, we lived way out in the country, so she needed more power to spy.)
5 – Have you ever kicked someone in the groin? I’ve accidentally kicked Sam a few times when we were horse playing.
6 – Would you pull a trigger? Absolutely I would.
7 – If you met your favorite celebrity, and they wanted to make out with you, would you? No. But if they wanted to send me naked selfies, I wouldn’t say no to that. 😉
8 – Have you ever slept in the same bed with someone you were not in a relationship with (not talking about sex and one-night-stands)? Yeah, my cousin and sister and I used to share a bed some as kids.
9 – Have you had one-night-stands? Nope.
10 – Does sex have the same importance to you now compared to when you were younger? Eh.
11 – Have you ever eaten a worm? Fuck no.
12 – What’s the grossest thing you’ve ever eaten? I tasted okra once. Blech.
13 – How long do you spend sitting on the toilet? Not long, as Baby Girl feels the need to assist me, so I try to get it over with as quickly as possible.
14 – What do you do when you sit there (besides the obvious)? When I’m not telling BG to put the toilet paper down, I’ll sometimes read on my phone. (Yeah, gross, I know.)
15 – Have you ever been peed at? Not that I can recall.
16 – What’s the grossest thing you have ever swallowed? Well, actually swallowed? Uh… But grossest thing I ever had in my mouth? That’d have to be baby poop, baby pee, and baby vomit. My kids were fucking awful to me as infants.
17 – What’s the constantly dirtiest place in your home? Bathroom.
18 – Why don’t you clean it? Because I didn’t make the mess, dammit.
19 – Do you eat your boogers? Srsly?
20 – Can you describe the one smell that makes you gag? Eggs do it every time. But smells of many, many foods also trigger my gag reflex, which makes for a picky eater.
21 – Have you ever had head lice? Yeah, when I was 5 or 6. My grandmother was upset because she thought everyone would think our family was trashy and dirty. A handout Little Man brought home in 5K that looks a lot like this one informed me that isn’t the case, though:
22 – Have you ever been utterly disappointed in someone? Yep.
23 – Have you ever been scared of someone? Definitely.
24 – What do you do when you’re drunk that you wouldn’t want anyone to know about? There was the time I recorded myself singing a bunch of Dixie Chicks songs, but otherwise, I’m usually amazeballs when I drink. I send the best drunk texts ever.
25 – Have you tried pole dancing? Nah.
26 – Have you been in a strip club? Yep, just to see what the big deal was.
27 – Have you ever run over an animal? Yeah, a squirrel. It made me cry.
28 – Have you ever peed in snow? Ew, why???
29 – Have you ever made fun of someone and then regretted it? Yeah, in high school. It was one of those payback situations, but I still knew better at the time and still regret it.
30 – What’s your favorite kind of question on Cards for Humanity (if you know the game)? I freaking love Cards Against Humanity! I don’t have a favorite, but seriously need to play it soon. Who’s up for a little Cards Against Humanity, Blog Style?
31 – If the father of your best friend hit on you, what would you say to him? I’d tell him to fuck off.
32 – Would you go out on a date with someone half your age or double your age? No.
33 – Do you clean the sink after brushing your teeth? I rinse it out.
34 – Have you ever spat in someone’s food or drink? No.
35 – Have you ever kissed someone only to be grossed out afterwards? Yeah. Joys of being a teenager.
36 – What is your number one goal in life, and are you living it? My goal is to be the best person, wife, and mother I can be. Some days yes, some days no.
37 – Do you spy on your neighbor(s)? If yes, why? No. I make it a point not to talk to the neighbors.
38 – Have you ever danced and/or cried in the rain? Nah.
39 – Have you ever ditched work to just chill out on your own (with or without Netflix)? I once left work early so I could watch a March Madness game that my school was in.
40 – What do you wish you were doing right now (anything goes)? Building an empire.
This doesn’t appear to be one of those surveys where you tag 15 people and guilt them into answering the questions, but y’all know I want you to do it anyway. 😀