Adios, June

Today is Day 30 of my June Writing Challenge. This marks the 15th day that I have posted, so I only posted half the time. That’s better than previous months, at least!

My husband took the kids camping yesterday in a nearby state park. It was Baby Girl’s first camping trip. I opted not to go, because I hate everything there is about camping. I don’t like the close proximity to people, how uncomfortable it is, the bugs, the lack of a nice, private bathroom, and the heat. Oof, the heat. My last camping trip was sometime before my husband and I got married. It was fall and we were in the Grandfather Mountain area in NC, so it was nice (and the only issues were being uncomfortable and lack of a nice bathroom).

For whatever reason, my husband decided that the end of June in South Carolina heat was a good time to introduce BG to camping. And not even in the mountains, where it probably would’ve been cool enough to sleep last night.

They came home around 11:30 to sleep.

My husband said BG wasn’t having any of sleeping in the tent. First, he forgot pillows and her sheet. She can’t sleep without those. Then she complained about being cold despite being soaked with sweat from the heat. She also complained about being hot, but this didn’t stop her legs from being cold because of the forgotten sheet. The air mattress was “yucky and horrible.” (I agree.) And then she didn’t want to sleep next to my husband and her brother, so she moved to sleep at their feet. And then she didn’t like them moving around, and when LM bumped her with his foot, she started hitting him and yelling.

I can only imagine what the campers nearby thought of all of this.

My husband said they tried to sleep in the car and gave BG the whole backseat to herself, but she didn’t have her sheet, so that didn’t work. When they came home around 11:30, they all crashed.

My husband did say the rest of the day was fun — fishing, hiking, roasting marshmallows, etc., so I guess next time just spending a day at the park will be the plan next time.

I had the evening to myself. I was going to go for a swim, but the ladder on the pool was messed up (my husband had to replace a bracket or something and forgot to put it on), so I just took a long bath. I had a nice rum drink to go with the bath and ate pizza, plus a Lily’s chocolate bar for dessert. Mmm. After playing a couple rounds of Fortnite, I watched a movie called Clemency, which was a pretty good movie. Having a few hours to myself was very nice! And now my husband will need the same after camping with the girl.

[Repost] Mommy Started the Fire!

I originally posted this in early June of 2016. Baby Girl was almost 2 and LM was 8. I have not attempted to make doughnuts since originally posting this.


Yesterday evening, I decided to make my family a sweet treat. After looking around online, I found what was supposed to be a super easy doughnut recipe — no need for yeast and all that waiting around. I checked to make sure I had the ingredients I needed (and I did except for one, but I had a substitute), so I announced to the family over supper than I planned to make them doughnuts.

Don’t they look good?

There was much excitement.

“Nonuts!” Baby Girl said and looked around, no doubt curious where I was hiding them.

“You’re the best mommy ever!” Little Man exclaimed. “I can’t wait!”

“You know how to make doughnuts?” my husband asked. Maybe there was more skepticism than excitement on his part.

After we finished eating, I pulled out all the ingredients, put a pot full of oil on to heat up, and started mixing everything up. I had to substitute butter for shortening, and noticed that it more clumped together with the sugar than creamed, but didn’t think much of it. I sifted the flour and mixed the ingredients (very carefully, I’ll add, so that I wouldn’t beat my finger this time) and realized that the recipe wasn’t going to work exactly right, as the consistency was more that of a thick pancake batter than a dough that I could roll out, cut, etc.

“Y’all, we’re having doughnut balls instead!” I called out. I figured I could just drop spoonfuls of the dough, shake some powdered sugar over them and no one would care too much that they weren’t O-shaped.

As I was finishing up, my husband came back into the kitchen and asked whether the oil was supposed to be smoking. A bit of time had passed by then, since it had taken me a while to find measuring cups and spoons. “I think it’s just steaming. That means it’s ready for the dough,” I informed him. I turned on the overhead fan.

the-office-head-shaking

I dropped a spoonful of dough in the oil. It instantly turned dark and started smoking quickly. This is where that thing certain people have said to me that annoys the hell out of me came into play — “you might be smart, but you don’t have much common sense.” Instead of taking the damn doughnut out of the grease and taking the pot off the burner, I started fumbling around with the window to open it and air out the kitchen. By then Baby Girl started coughing in her high chair and yelled “Mommy!” at me and gave me a nasty look. So I took her out and handed her to Sam and told him to take the kids in another room and ran back into the kitchen.

Finally it dawned on me to turn off the stove and remove the pot, so I did. The grease was popping everywhere and was hot as hell (duh), so I went to the backdoor to take it outside. My eyes could have been deceiving me, but just as I walked out on the back porch, it looked like the doughnut sparked out of the corner of my eye. I sat the pot down and looked around, trying to figure out what to do. (Clearly jobs where one has to make split-second decisions, no matter how obvious the decisions are, are out for me.) Since the pot was still smoking, I decided to dump the contents over the back porch onto the thankfully very wet ground and watched as the smoke finally slacked off.

Upon realizing that my doughnut looked like a really dark turd, I went back in for my camera and took a picture of it.

Darth Vader’s helmet? A nasty mushroom? Poop? Nope, a burned doughnut.

Back in the house, things were pretty smoky. Little Man came running in with a bag over his head, which he called his breathing mask.

“Mommy, what did you do?! Are you trying to kill us all?”

“We’re going to drive down to my Mom’s for a while,” my husband said.

I stayed behind and opened up the rest of the windows and poured water on the doughnut turd just in case. When my sweet little family came home, they made a big deal about being able to breathe again and gave me a lot of shit about the whole thing. (Well, not Baby Girl, but if she could talk more, she’d probably be the ring leader.)

“She’s Fire Girl!” Little Man told Sam.

“Mommy started the fire! It was always burning since the world’s been turning,” Sam sang. If you’re a fan of The Office, you probably know what they’re referencing. If not, it’s a song one of the characters sings when another guy starts a fire with his cheesy pita.

ryan-started-the-fire-gif

After telling me that his mom thought my doughnut attempt was hilarious, my husband commented that he should’ve known better when I told him that the oil was supposed to steam.

“What’d you put the burner on?” he asked.

“High.”

“High?! Why would you ever put it on high? That probably should have been on medium heat.”

“I always put it on high, but then turn it down after I put the food in.” In my defense, I rarely fry foods, as I don’t like the smell of the oil.

“That’s now how you do it,” he said.

Apparently.

I still have the rest of the batter left, and it smells heavenly. My husband has offered to try making the doughnut balls with it tomorrow, so we’ll see how his attempt goes.

(We have two fire extinguishers, in case you’re wondering.)

Any big cooking screw ups for any of y’all lately? 

June 1

Thirty days of blogging is officially underway. This is just going to be a rambling post, nothing spectacular to start off a blog challenge 😉

Summer vacation has officially started. It’s weird starting vacation without my long list of things to do during the summer. Vacation, weekend trips, overnight stays at the waterpark resort, museums, Chuck E. Cheese, camps, the summer reading program, etc. Unless things change big-time, it looks like we’ll be doing summer the same way I did growing up.

Aside from my brief stint with the Girl Scouts and doing their week-long day camp, I didn’t do summer camps. We typically went to either the beach or the mountains for a week, but that was the extent of our overnight stays. We didn’t go to Chuck E. Cheese or museums or much of anywhere. We did go to the library a lot, although our library didn’t have summer programs for kids past third grade or so. My grandma would take us each week, and we would spend hours there. Definitely the highlight of my summers. Aside from that, most of my summer was spent hanging out at home, playing outside, reading, watching TV, seeing my cousin occasionally, and playing video games. We lived in a rural area, so there wasn’t a neighborhood with kids to play with.

A summer that isn’t overplanned and exhausting (as my summer plans tend to be) will be a change, but good in many ways, I’m sure.

A friend of mine had a drive-by birthday party for her son yesterday. (The birthday kid/parents stay outside and people stay in their cars and drive by to wish them a happy birthday.) We went through to say hello and drop off a gift. Baby Girl got to talk to someone her age in person for the first time in 2.5 months, and she was overjoyed. ❤ Her birthday is in three weeks, so I guess we’ll be doing the same thing.

Right now I’m listening to Baby Girl sing as I write. She’s singing “[Little Man] is a butt!” over and over. LM isn’t even in the house.

Wanna hear the source of a major fallout at my house the other day? Better yet, let me show you.

Amazon.com: Magic 8 Ball: Mini: Toys & Games

My cousin and I used to use this in our tween/early teen years to determine our future husbands. (Note: I did not marry JTT, despite what the ball said.) The fortune telling toy is bad news for the Anxious household, though. Baby Girl started things by asking if LM was a brat. (SIGH) It said, “Yes definitely,” much to her glee. So LM took it and asked it the same question, and it also said “yes” for her. She started straight up sobbing.

“Magic 8 Ball is always right! It said I’m a brat!”

After several minutes of crying, she took the ball and asked, “Is Magic 8 Ball the King of the Idiots?”

Thankfully the damn thing said “yes.” (I think they probably weren’t doing a good job of shaking it up.) And that settled it — the King of the Idiots couldn’t be trusted to tell the truth, so she was fine. (And then she asked it if I’m a bad mom today, it said yes, and she was upset again. I don’t know why the hell I haven’t donated it to Goodwill yet and made it someone else’s problem.)

Happy Monday, y’all.

Worms And More

This week did not go exactly as planned. Shocker!

I planned for the kids to do a whole unit on germs/bacteria/viruses this week. That got derailed on Wednesday when the kids got bit by worm fever. They are all about worms now, and want to spend a bunch of time researching worms, digging them up, finding better ways to lure them out, etc.

The kids: “We’re going to try to lure out the worms by banging some shit on the ground so they sense the vibrations and come up.” (Well, they used different phrasing, but what they said meant the same thing.)

Me: “No, don’t get your stuff muddy. Just make the sounds right above the ground. The worms will hear you and come up.”

The kids:

Look At Each Other Glance GIF - LookAtEachOther Glance ...

They did not, because as I later learned, worms do not have ears. Like, I knew they didn’t have outside ears, but thought they had some sort of internal listening thing going on. Nope. The kids were 100 percent right, and I was wrong.

So, the bacteria cookies didn’t get made today. I guess I can give myself a pat on the back for self-guided learning and flexibility, eh? Maybe we can finish up my germ plans next week. The kids made a “worm habitat” as they called it. They’re trying to be all fancy and not call it a worm farm. The worm habit is set up in the corning of my living room covered by a blanket because worms like dark places.

LM also wanted the blanket because he’s worried that BG will see the worms procreate.

LM: “The worms might, YOU KNOW. You know, right? I don’t want BG to see that.”

Me: “Worms have both sex organs and reproduce with themselves. But even if they did have sex and BG saw it, it’s not a big deal. It’s just worms.”

LM: “I don’t think that’s right.”

The Office No GIF - Find & Share on GIPHY

As it turns out, I really don’t know much about worms, and the kids taught me more than I taught them this week.

Even though my plans did get derailed, we did take a look at our bacteria swabs today. Stuff grew. Especially stuff from LM’s hands.

The bacteria all kinda look the same, so I wonder if we screwed that up. (Well, I wonder if I screwed that up.) Even if I did, I think it hit home with LM that he needs to do a better job of washing his hands. He tried to argue with me that he doesn’t really need to wash his hands more because the soap dispenser has germs, too, so it’s a waste. WTF, kid. Did he learn nothing during the rise of the pandemic?!

So, I decided I wanted to be artistic and do one of those paint and pour deals. I’ve always wanted to do one, but didn’t really want to go be around people (plus I don’t care for wine), but the art studio decided to sell kits to paint at home. I got one for the kids and myself. (No pouring for them.) BG lost patience and rushed through hers. LM did well on the first half, but lost patience and decided his painting didn’t need background colors. I lost patience shortly after doing the background. There were so many colors to mix, and I had it.

My husband said he was surprised I lasted that long. I do my little doodles, but it’s different because it’s on a tablet, and I can just hold down my stylus and automatically fill in the colors.

And speaking of my husband, guess who lost his phone again?

Mm-hmm.

This man has had so many burner phones that I’m surprised he hasn’t been investigated for being a drug dealer. (Yeah, I watched The Wire.) He used to get cheap flip phones that cost $25 and when he’d lose them, he’d just buy another and get a new number, since it was easier than calling customer service. And then I got sick of him always wanting to hold my phone to look stuff up and got him a fancy iPhone 6S for Father’s Day. (In 2019.) We got LM the same model, because I didn’t trust getting him a phone that cost more than $99, either.

He went a long time without losing that phone, but then he was digging a hole for a post to fix our porch and couldn’t find it later. (The battery died, too, so Find My Phone wasn’t available.) He looked all over the yard for it, and then it rained the next two days, so I ordered a SIM for his phone number for the backup phone. The day I ordered the SIM, my husband decided to try to dig up the area around the post and found the phone. It was caked in mud, of course, but after cleaning it up, it charged right up and works just fine.

I hope y’all found the story of the buried phone exciting. If not, you’ll love my trip out today. I went through the drive-through of Chick-Fil-A.

Chick Fil A UCVotes2017 GIF - ChickFilA UCVotes2017 Bashir ...

I wanted an hour to myself. Enjoy the quiet or listen to my music. But BG said she wanted to have a Girl’s Day Out and ride to Chick-Fil-A together, so that’s what we did. Our GDO’s aren’t quite what they used to be, but the sandwich, ice cream, and FOUNTAIN COKE IN A STYROFOAM CUP WITH CRUSHED ICE were heavenly. (That’s the only way to drink a Coke, FYI. Canned on ice is great, but nothing beats my ALL CAPS way of drinking a Coke.)

So, that was my week. I’m sure I’ll have all sorts of exciting things to write about on Monday. We’ve got big plans this weekend — putting up a new storage shed, mopping, and cleaning out LM’s dresser drawers. He can still wear his athletic shorts from 3rd grade since they fit fine in the waist, but they are short as hell. Some of them are short like that:

80s & 90s NBA gifs | Nba, Basketball moves, Ohio state basketball

He doesn’t like getting rid of anything (he has a t-shirt from 2nd grade in his pajama drawer, sigh), but they’re getting ratty. I ordered new shorts from Target during my most recent midnight shopping spree, so I’ve gotta make room.

Exciting weekend ahead!

I hope y’all had a safe and healthy week.

Anxious Mom Writes Words

I am so tired of trying to think up titles for my posts.

Did y’all know Amazon does something called “Returnless Refunds” for some items now? I ordered a pack of primary notebooks for BG and intended to get the ones that have a drawing space, but instead got ones that had full writing pages. My mistake. I initiated a return so I could get the right ones, and apparently, Amazon doesn’t want some items back and will just straight up give your money back and let you keep the item.

Visible Confusion GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

That’s the first I’ve heard of that, but okey-doke. I ordered the correct ones, and hopefully they’ll be here tomorrow. We’re doing both pandemic homeschooling and legit homeschooling this week, so the kids are gonna loooove me.

Really, though, LM started on the packet he got from his middle school on Friday because he’s excited about our plans. We’re going to study germs and have more fun than you ever thought would be possible while learning about that sort of thing. That’s the plan anyway. Both kids are helping me come up with themes for each week and are way more excited about this than I thought they’d be. We want to make petri dish cookies on the last day.

Ours will probably not look like that.

We’re going to do a couple of sheets on the school packet straight away each morning and then move on to our activities. Since a) the kids probably won’t go back to school anyway and b) the district will likely give kids longer than two weeks to complete the packets, we will do a little each day so that it gets done but spend most of our time on our units.

So, the girl had some good days last week! The meltdowns were minimal up until Saturday.

We did a first as a family of four — we went fishing. My friend messaged me and suggested I bring the kids fishing at her pond, and my husband decided it was time for BG to try fishing. He loves to go fishing, so it was a big deal for him. BG was excited about it, too. I tried to prepare her for what to expect (“Sometimes people don’t catch anything…), and I brought a picnic basket with snacks in it (this is the one way to keep the child content).

Wouldn’t you know the girl had the first catch of the day? It was on her first cast and she got a bite in what seemed like less than 30 seconds. It was wild. She was so happy. She took a break then from all of the fishing and chilled out on her little camper chair and had a snack. I got to use her little Paw Patrol pole to fish (and I caught a few, too). She begged me to try to catch a huge turtle that was swimming around the pond on my hook and didn’t quite understand why that wouldn’t work too well. 😀 ❤

We drove separately so I could bring back BG if she was having a rough time, and we ended up staying an hour before we were both ready to head back. My husband was ready to leave, too, but LM wanted to stay, so they fished for another hour and had some nice daddy-son time. BG told me on the way home that she loved fishing. That was probably the most fun we’ve had some the quarantine started.

I might not be an outdoorsy sort of person, but I think I can get behind more of this. (As long as it’s in the evening and not too hot!)

And yall, I totally took a fish off a hook. My husband had his hands full with BG’s fish at one point and LM needed help, so I stepped up.

My husband’s face:

Surprised Pikachu | Know Your Meme

My husband said he was shocked I would even touch a fish, let alone hold one long enough to remove the hook. I didn’t know how long fish can last out of water, though, so I did what I had to.

Thor Ragnarok GIF - Thor Ragnarok ChrisHemsworth - Discover ...

Hehe. Those arms, though.

So, BG had a few good days, but Saturday and Sunday were rough ones for her meltdown-wise, and guess what…the fever is back. (I think the fever was there for the majority of her really bad meltdown days as well.) It was away for a week but was 101.8 yesterday at one point. I checked her temperature throughout the day, and it’s normal at times, but warm at others. She had bursts of energy here and there the past two days, but mostly complained of being tired. She also mentioned having a headache and then feeling nauseous and threw up once, but her stomach didn’t bother her again after I gave her the reflux medicine.

I’m going to talk to her doctor again tomorrow if the fever is still there. Or maybe I should talk to her regardless if this is going to be a “comes and goes” deal. I hate the idea of putting her through getting her blood drawn if it’s just a viral thing that’s kinda hanging around. She had to be held down by me, the doctor, and the nurse (the nurse half held down, half gave the shot) when she had her last round of vaccines, so this would go much worse.

On another note, let me tell y’all what my son did. No, let me tell you what my husband’s son did. (That’s how we do things when people fuck up, right? They become someone else’s son/husband/whatever.) I was checking my email yesterday morning and had three emails about Playstation purchases. THREE. That child made two purchases for $25 each and one for $10 to buy Fortnite skins. In case you can’t math, SIXTY DOLLARS. And in case you can math, SIXTY DOLLARS.

I was like WTF?? I asked about it and LM said, “Well, last night you said I could get a Fortnite skin for doing so much work outside.”

Oh, no.

What happened was I told him he could get some V-Bucks (Fortnite dollars) to get a skin like he did the last time worked hard outside with his dad. He got $10 for V-Bucks last time. I asked him in what world did saying he could get some V-Bucks mean spend $60. “Well, I said I wanted the Deadpool skins. I thought I could get those and give you some of my birthday money for the weapons pack.”

Michael Scott Mad GIFs | Tenor

And those skins don’t even DO anything. They give you another character to play as, but it doesn’t impact the game at all.

My debit card is no longer linked to the Playstation account, and LM has a bit more work to do in the coming weeks. Sigh.

I think I mentioned trying to learn how to sew on one of these posts, but if I didn’t, I know a few of y’all know from Instagram. I’ve been doing better at it! I’m hoping to get some fabric and make blankets for the kids. The ones I make will be more expensive than just buying one, but I hope it’s something they’ll want to hold on to as they get older.

I have made and given out 30 masks for the COVID stuff. My first few masks look straight up awful, but I finally found a pattern that was almost foolproof and didn’t have as many issues. I went from this:

Looks like someone butchered a poor bra.

To this:

WoWo’s in distress because her movie was rescheduled!

Craaaazy eyes!


So, last week I mentioned doing a Zoom happy hour type thing and a few of y’all expressed interest. Yay! I hope to set that up for sometime this week. I’ll email y’all and figure out dates/times. If anyone else is interested, you can message me at thatanxiousmom@gmail.com.

Whoever participates, DON’T BE LIKE JENNIFER.

I laughed so hard at this video. Those people’s reactions were priceless.

“I saw nothing.”

Have a good week, y’all 🙂

Brain Dump: Week of 1/6

It looks like the lice have been eradicated from our household. (KNOCK ON WOOD.) The girl is the only who got them, and hopefully the rest of us won’t either since I treated all of our heads to be on the safe side. BG got treated twice and will again tonight. The men-folk are none too please about having their hair checked every day and getting treated, but oh well. Better to be inconvenienced than pass anything around.

School started back yesterday, only LM couldn’t go because he got sick on Sunday. Great timing, kid! My husband took him to the doctor yesterday morning and the doc things he has an upper respiratory thing going on. I started hacking my head off yesterday afternoon, so I guess it’ll make its way through the house. Boo.

We didn’t do anything for New Year’s Eve but did hit up the zoo on New Year’s Day. It was BG’s first time going, and she loved it for the most part. (Until she got burned out and had a meltdown in the penguin area, which is my favorite.) We spent a lot of time looking at the lions, but despite her little lion obsession, I think her favorite thing was the King Cobra, which she called adorable. That fucker was huge! She sat there for 20 minutes staring at the thing. LM and my husband made their way around the rest of the reptile exhibits while she stared, and I tried to avoid looking at the creepy thing.

(BTW, she said if the King Cobra got out of his aquarium type setup, whatever it’s called, he would totally be best friends with her and want to hug her. We had to have another talk about not touching things like that if we were to come across a snake or whatever outside.)

We spent the rest of the week cleaning out shit. The living room, game closet, books, and LM’s room. LM cannot stay on top of keeping his room remotely tidy at all, so my husband and I were both fed up since he made zero progress over the break. My husband bought 10 huge totes and took them in. LM was upset, of course, but we let him pick out a few of each things he enjoys, like his Transformers and Nerf guns, with the promise that if he can keep his room clean then he could earn stuff back eventually. We filled up 7 of the totes, which is crazy. We plan to do the same with the girl’s room this weekend. LM told me today that he likes his room better without so much stuff in it, so that’s good.

Do y’all remember me commenting on the Pac Praying poster my husband bought LM for Christmas, how I thought the label was for Pac-Man Praying and was super confused? I’m sure most of y’all figured out that it referred to Tupac. While we were helping LM with his room, he opened the poster to hang it. The look on his face was priceless when he saw this:

Image result for tupac praying poster

“Oh wow,” he said. Wow, indeed. That’s an odd choice for an 11-year-old boy. I tried to suppress my snickers.

“I just had to get it for you,” my husband told him. “Where do you want to hang it?”

LM hemmed and hawed long enough that my husband realized he didn’t want to hang it. “You don’t want to hang it? You don’t like it?” he asked.

“I do like it,” LM said. “But it’s so weird.”

My husband looked offended. “Why is it weird?”

I started laughing. “Look at it!” I said. “He isn’t wearing a shirt and has his eyes closed, praying. That’s a bizarre poster choice.”

“Well, I thought it was cool,” my husband said, somewhat offended. “I guess I’ll just throw it away.”

“No, don’t throw it away!” LM exclaimed. “I’m grateful for it and all. I’ll just keep it in my closet it for now and hang it when I don’t have friends anymore.” He was dead serious, too, which made me laugh even harder.

How has the start of 2020 gone for you so far?

About Anxious Mom, As Narrated By Morgan Freeman

While updating my About Me page, I decided to have a little fun with it. And since there has been an influx of new followers, I thought I’d share that page as a blog post. Welcome aboard, new folks.


Per the blog post title, you should read this in Morgan Freeman’s voice. 

Anxious Mom, who is known as “Mommy,” “Mom,” or “Momo” by her children, is a 30-something woman who resides in the Deep South. (And by “resides,” we mean “suffers” due to the unbearable heat and humidity.) She has two heathens — a son in middle school and a daughter in kindergarten. When the children aren’t busy tormenting each other, they torture their mother in ways only children can.

There are many things Anxious Mom enjoys doing in her spare time. If you ask her directly, she’d probably tell you that she loves reading and doing intellectual activities such as going to the museum. If you observe her in her habitat, however, you’ll find that she mostly watches shows on Netflix and plays games in her downtime. She is particularly fond of comedies, including The Office, Parks and Rec, Friends, and Brooklyn Nine-Nine. She has jokingly said that liking one of those shows is required to be friends with her, but through careful observation, we have learned it is not, in fact, a joke.

If you asked Anxious Mom about her background, she’d tell you that she did a brief stint as a teacher before becoming a stay-at-home-mom. Since then, she has done freelance work part-time, including providing content writing and editing services. Her primary job, however, is working as a chauffeur. This is where she truly excels in life, as she has a penchant for punctuality (as long as her children and husband don’t intervene) and safety. The mother, who we suspect was a hall monitor in another life, is proud of having never gotten a speeding ticket. She does, however, fill her swear jar every other day thanks to her time on the road, so she isn’t as goody-two-shoes as she seems.

As you can see, Anxious Mom is a blogger. Some people call her a mommy blogger, and that irritates her greatly. “I am a mom who blogs,” she maintains, as though there is truly a difference. She has blogged for five years and writes about herself and her family. When she first started blogging, she wrote a lot about her mental health, and it’s suspected that she’ll do so again. The rapidly-approaching-middle-age mother is also fond of writing blog posts where she rants about meaningless topics.

This concludes our glimpse into the life Anxious Mom. You can read her other blog posts or follow her on Instagram for other mundane insights into her life.

Saturday Randomness

Yay, it’s the weekend!

And, yay, both sets of grandparents invited the kids over for Friday and Saturday! That means double weekend date night, a first in the history of Baby Girl. My husband and I went out last night to our favorite Italian restaurant and I had my usual chicken parm. (Obviously the 30-day keto challenge got postponed dammit.) It was so damn good. I had leftovers and threatened my husband’s life if he dared touch them like he did last time.

He also ordered a slice of chocolate cake, which ended up being enough for four people.

Yum.

I texted LM during the meal and taunted him with the cake, which didn’t amuse him very much.

Not shown is the other half of the cake, which we did bring home for the boy.

I doubt we’ll go anywhere tonight, so it’ll be a stay-at-home date night. He has whiskey and I’ll have rum and vodka, so we’ll do Hulu and for-real chill.

It looks like we’ll have guests in a few weeks. My in-laws are moving their mobile home and asked to stay with us for a few days. I love them to death, but am not looking forward to it, mostly because my father-in-law is the loudest person in the world. And as someone who a) takes out her hearing devices around him and b) is mostly deaf in one ear and has a severe loss in the “good” ear, that’s saying something. He and BG get going and it’s so loud that you literally can’t converse with anyone else in the room. Hello, headache town. They’ve always been good to us, though, so we could never say no to helping them out. I will be buying a new bottle of Excedrin migraine reliever, though.

This past school week ended up being good for BG for the most part. We had minimal crying in the mornings. On Thursday night, though, she had a meltdown of epic proportions because she didn’t want to go to school. She was in the bathtub of all place, and when it was time to wash up and get out, she refused because getting cleaned meant she had to go to bed soon and going to bed soon meant she had school in the morning. Oh my god, y’all. I came in to find her in the corner of the tub out of my husband’s reach (it’s a large garden tub) throwing water toys at him. I couldn’t get her to come to me, either, so I was like “fuck it” and got in.

Imagine this:

Except for it’s a 33-pound kid who is wet and somewhat sudsy from the bubble bath. And there’s also legs kicking, fingers clawing, and teeth attempting to bite. Plus screaming. Holy fucking hell. That’s the worst meltdown I’ve seen in a while. Lawdamercy Jesus, as my grandmother would say. We needed a truck load of Xanax after that.

We’ve been getting our Halloween costume plans together. Looks like we’ll do another family thing this year, and this time it’ll be Marvel Cinematic Universe inspired. BG is planning to be either Groot or Rocket or Loki, with a lean towards Groot because she wants to play “Mr. Blue Sky” on the phone and dance to it while trick-or-treating. I’m going as 90s grungy Carol Danvers, my husband is planning to be Bruce Banner mid Hulk-out, and the boy wants to be either Hawkeye or Black Panther. I love doing the family costumes! Last year we did the Incredibles and a year or two before that, we did DC. Now if our hell-on-earth state could just shift over to fall-like weather…

I’ve been thinking about a blog makeover. Maybe come up with a new name for it. Hmm.

What randomness would you like to share from your week?