Ready to tune in to the Anxious Mom Blabs On And On story hour? You’re probably wondering, “How is this any different from normal?” It’s really not, but you know how I am on liking slightly funny opening paragraphs before I launch into all my stuff. Maybe you don’t find this slightly funny at all, but if not, boo on you, as my sister used to say (and that definitely works for this, because Halloween).
First and foremost, Happy Halloween! And if you don’t celebrate Halloween or think that it’s the devil’s holiday or something, then Happy Almost November!
Remember how everyone in my house was sick? Now, just in time to go out and get loads and loads of sugary substances, my kids are feeling much better. No more leaky faucet noses (and, btw, it really sucks when your toddler smushes her leaky faucet nose in your face, even if it is for a kiss), no more fevers, no more sounding like lungs are being coughed up.
Last night we took the kids around to trick or treat at the grandparents and to my best friend’s house. Their bags are already full, no joke. At my dad’s house, despite giving them lunch sacks full of candy, my dad broke out the candy jar to give them even more. We don’t even need to go tonight, but we will, and then they’ll refill their bags. Hello, sugar comas!
Also, on Halloween, Sam and I went to my friend’s Halloween party this weekend. I pulled off my Washed Up Wonder Woman costume quite well, and Sam went as Forrest Gump. The party was great with no fights, gunshots, firecracker injuries, or torn MCLs this time. Success!
Now for my next blabbing on and on topic — Little Man. The kiddo is still killing it in soccer this season. Their team is now 0-7-2 — that’s right, they’ve added in two ties since the last time I mentioned soccer. One of them should’ve been a win, but the ref missed something really important that led to a goal. The kids were happy not to lose, though. LM has really stood out this season, to the point that other coaches have come up talking to us after the game about how “phenomenal” he is. This makes LM feel so good! He promised he wouldn’t get cocky, though.
Out of all the good stuff, there was one bad thing. I had a bit of a meltdown on Saturday. Shortly before we dropped the kids off at the grandparents on Saturday, LM asked to get on my computer and play a game. I told him he could and he showed me the “cool game” he plays at school.
Y’all. This game was called Party Hard and the goal was to go into a house where people were drinking and passed out and murder as many as possible and evade the police. He is EIGHT. Apparently he plays it at the computer lab at school during downtime. I freaked out and told him not to play that, and talked about why that was inappropriate for him. After he left, I got on the website to see what other games were on there. Mixed in with kid friendly games were games where you worked as a stripper and increased certain assets to earn more money from clients, more killing games, a bartender game, lots of gory games, and a game where you tried to commit suicide in five minutes or less.
Cue a panic attack. The suicide game sent me over the edge. You hear more and more about young kids killing themselves these days, add that in with my family history of depression/bipolar, knowing that my depression has had me thinking that way before, something that makes suicide into being fun/a game being available to a young kid with anxiety issues, and, well, damn. I had to take an anxiety pill to calm down.
My husband talked to the principal today and told him all about it, and he was appalled. The school uses the same filtering software as the district, and he couldn’t believe something like that would get by. He said he’d take it to the district and talk to the teachers in the lab to make them aware. I wanted my husband to find out why multiple kids were able to access this site multiple times and not be noticed by the lab person and why their histories weren’t reviewed regularly (a game with that title should stand out, you’d think), but he forgot to ask. The principal said he’d be following up with us, so maybe we’ll get more information then and talk to them about changing how they’re monitoring this stuff. I adore the teacher he has this year, but between a sub locking LM out (and the woman wasn’t allowed back at that school) and this, I’m getting close to wanting to transfer him out.
(Maybe I should’ve made that a post on its own, since I kinda got away from the lighthearted beginning. But whatever. And while I’m on the topic of depression and suicide, please check out my friend Matty’s new series. On his blog Confessions, he’s asking for guests posts from people who have experience in that department to share their stories and give hope to others who are in that place. You can check out his post here and get his contact info if you want to participate.)
I think that’ll be a wrap for my blabby, all over the place post.