Today, after shoving a bunch of shit off the kitchen table, I’d grab a couple mugs (no, not red cups of doom) and offer you either a Krispy Kreme Morning Blend K-Cup or a Starbucks Hot Cocoa K-Cup. We fancy bitches in the Anxious household today! There’s also a bit of sweet potato pie left, plus some banana pudding my mother-in-law sent over, and some dark chocolate bark that I purchased and didn’t like.
After you entertain me with stories of all the drunken family fights you saw both at your Thanksgiving feast and at Walmart during the shopping madness, you’ll ask me if I’ve done any of my Christmas shopping.
“It’s mostly done,” I say while dusting off an invisible piece of lint from my shoulder. “I hit up Amazon and knocked off a bunch of family members, took care of Baby Girl and Little Man. Now all I have left is a couple of draws, the parents, our friends…”
You’d give me a look.
“Fuck. It’s not mostly done. Maybe half done. Buuuuut, I did find Sam the perfect gift last night.” I show you the following.
I’d point out that I only bought a replica of his guitar strap, but overall agree that I’ve outdone myself this year.
Brag moment: I’m really good at thoughtful stuff for my husband. A few years ago I bought a signed Ryne Sandberg card for him. The next year I got him something signed by Jake Delhomme. Another year it was a rookie autographed Cal Ripken Jr. card. And this year, of course, I’m buying him the guitar strap that looks like the one his favorite musician ever uses. And I’m getting him a little toy Skeletor that he mentioned liking as a kid.
After moving on from the Christmas shopping stuff, I’d tell you that I’m really killing the social shit this week since on top of the blog meet and seeing the families for Thanksgiving, I’m going to a friend’s party today. It’s a party to drown our sorrows over how shitty the fucking Gamecocks football team was this year.
My birthday is coming up–on Tuesday, if you’d like to send cake–so that should be interesting because of Sam. Last year around 6:00 PM it dawned on him he hadn’t bought a gift, cake, or planned dinner, so he ran me a bubble bath and went to town and came back with Food Lion cake, sandwiches from Arby’s, and a gift. The master of birthdays he is not! But he’s good at the other things.
Tell me about your weekend–anything interesting going on?
Weekend Coffee Share is hosted by Diana at Part-Time Monster.