Pet Peeve: People Stopping By

Don’t you just love it when people stop by your house either at a moment’s notice or with no notice at all?

Oh wait, that’s not you? It’s not me, either.

To put it lightly, I am not a fan of people dropping in. Unless I send out fancy invitations with cursive words on them that suggest one stop by, I don’t do drop-ins. Or dropping by. Or popping over. Or any of the other phrases people use that really mean “I’m gonna intrude on your privacy.”

“Never invite yourself over,” my grandma taught me as a kid when I asked my aunt if I could spend the night. “Sometimes people aren’t up to having others over and it makes them feel bad to say ‘no.'”

That’s a good rule. One I live by. It doesn’t make me feel bad to tell people “no,” though–just irritated that they apparently don’t live by the same code. Which happens to be a lot of the people in my life.

“I don’t mind if your house is messy,” my mother-in-law has told me if I don’t immediately agree to her stopping by when she suggests it.

Well, I do.

And thank you for assuming that my house is gonna be a mess.

“I don’t mind if you’re sick,” the “friend” told me earlier this year when I explained why I wasn’t up for company after she informed me she was coming over. “I want to get out for a while.”

Um, I mind. My snotty, feels like shit, still in pajamas, hasn’t had time to clean the house self minds. It took quite a bit of effort to convince her that she wasn’t coming over, too.

I got especially irritated over the weekend. My brother messaged me saying he was going to come over. He didn’t ask, he told. Grr. I let him know that we weren’t going to be home (a lie). Well, he called my bluff and came over anyway.

Not cool, bro, not cool at all. And for that you get me not putting a bra back on. So there.

Are you cool with people stopping by whenever? Or are you like me, the curmudgeon who wants a life size Gandalf on her porch that bellows, “You shall not pass!” What are some of your pet peeves?


40 thoughts on “Pet Peeve: People Stopping By

  1. Oh no! DO NOT stop by my house. One reason, is my schedule is insane. Two, I have two dogs who go absolutely ballistic at the sound of someone at the door. So ballistic in fact, they have gotten into fights. My friends know this are really good about texting me or setting appointments with me. I value my time and I need things to get done. I don’t mince words about my space and my time.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I like the way you think! It’s not so much my schedule and time as it is being ornery as hell. Sure, I could blame Baby Girl’s nap schedule or LM’s school stuff but bottom line, don’t stop by unless I ask!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. SLAMS ON THE BRAKES … oh, I was just on my way over! 😉 You can drop in on me anytime. Can’t guarantee I’ll be home. But, if I am, I will happily brew you a pot of tea while you climb over the mess and dig the couch out from under the clean, unfolded laundry.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. Depends on the mood swings. Some days I want company, some days I want the Balrog guarding my front lawn to scare off all the assholes. Especially those damn soliciters where it is PLAINLY IN SIGHT-NO SOLICITING! And maybe Aragorn Legolas Gimli and Gandalf perched out front as well. STAY THE FUCK OFF MY LAWN BITCHES

    Liked by 1 person

  4. There are a handful of people who can stop by any ol time and I am always happy to see them. These are the same people whose calls will bypass my silent phone while I sleep. These people can see me naked and are allowed to use my laptop. I will leave these people in my house while I leave. It’s a very small group.
    My MIL is close to this, but not quite. My FIL is nowhere near this group, but he drops by all the bloody time. I have been blunt, damn near rude about it. I have told him time and time again to at least give me notice, but I believe he enjoys finding me or my house (or both) a mess. I think it pleases him to piss me off. I have no proof of this and often take shit personally, but I really, really do think this.
    In fact, since there are painting supplies all over the hall and paint on me, I’m surprised he hasn’t come over to borrow the lawn mower. Perhaps it’s because I am not napping. Maybe he’s waiting for me to color my hair or take a bath.
    I swear to you, if I clean out my cupboards, paint, sew, bake pies, cook up a messa greens, or do anything that messes up my house, it’s like a subliminal invitation for him to appear. I’m ferreal. Now you read me enough to know, my house is never messy in a way that bothers other people, cause you know I hate a mess, but I wouldn’t INVITE people over while I’m in the midst of a project, or hangin out braless and mud-masked, and there’s a reason for that! Manners!
    I thank you once again for this opportunity to vent.
    pumps fist

    Liked by 1 person

    • Lmao. Dude must have a sixth sense when it comes to you! Reminds me of when we were living in my grandmother’s house my dad rented and it was summer and hot as fuck. So hot that I ditched pants that day since we were staying inside and the air couldn’t get the place cooled off. Clearly that’s asking for trouble. My dad and my brother both decided to stop by, no notice, and let himself in with his key. It was awkward. For them. Wasn’t my problem and they never let themselves in again at least!


  5. lolabipola says:

    I don’t mind some people dropping by, or popping in. Others, it riles me up no end. Also, it depends on where I’m at with my mood. Either way, if my house is a mess (which is often), and they don’t like it, they don’t have to come. I’ve told my mother this numerous times. “If you don’t like it when my house is a mess mom, then don’t fucking come over.” She just ignores me and cleans my house… Score!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Just Plain Ol' Vic says:

    I am around people all day, so when I get home I like to have things quiet. I get irritated when my kids have friends over unexpectedly (I don’t say anything or look outwardly grumpy – I just get irritated).

    Liked by 1 person

  7. N. says:

    I come from a culture where stopping by unannounced (and expecting snacks or a proper meal) is the norm but that still doesn’t mean I have to like it 😂 My brother-in-laws wife likes to cook large meals and freeze a portion in case someone drops by unannounced for dinner and always advices me to do the same. Me? No way am I doing that! If someone shows up, we can order out 😑

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Mindy says:

    I think it depends on how well I like the person. If it’s someone I’m really close to, I’ll be excited. If it’s not… I’ll smile on the outside, but on the inside I’ll be angry.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. [humor]i was in the neighborhood, the wordpress reader, and i thought i’d stop on by and read your blog. man, i can’t believe all the words you have around here. don’t you ever clean up. look at the pile of punctuation in the sink. looks like you better get on top of that. oh, I can’t believe you’d leave your spaces out like that; that’s disgusting! oh, look out front; it looks like it’s been a while since your mowed your participles. it looks like they are getting a little long. look at all the adjectives on the stairs. you really should have your kids put those away after they’re done with them.[/humor] lol

    Liked by 1 person

Write Some Words, Yo

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s