“I offered Andrew one of my Pokemon cards today,” Little Man told me after I picked him up from school one day last week. “He doesn’t have any and I wanted him to have one.”
Aw. “That’s sweet,” I told LM. “You’re a good friend.”
“The weird thing is, he didn’t act like he wanted it at first. He said he’d have to think about it. Andrew is a lot like you, Mom.”
“Yeah, he’s really quiet. And moody. And thinks a lot. But he isn’t funny like you.”
Well, at least I have my sense of humor.
“You guys are kind of like Eeyore. Exactly like Eeyore. He doesn’t get excited or really happy over anything. Even when his friends are having fun, he’s just like ‘whatever.'”
Truthfully, I’ve never paid much attention to any of the Winnie the Pooh movies. I didn’t watch it as a kid, and the bit I’ve watched as an adult I found too annoying because of Tigger. My husband thinks they’re awesome, though. Thanks to the little I have seen as well as the memes posted on Facebook, I know that Eeyore is pegged as the depressive one, though.
All things considered, I guess it makes sense that he associates me with Eeyore. Except for my sense of humor (unless Eeyore is funny in his way). Even when I’m not depressed, I’m still fairly quiet and reserved with my behavior. And I doubt the high feeling hypomania causes is obvious to him, outside of me running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Even if it is, it’s certainly not part of my normal behavior.
So why am I writing this? I think that comment would probably have made me feel like an awful parent a few months ago. I don’t care too much, now, though. I am who I am, and Little Man will learn more about what makes his mom tick as he gets older. But I’m not apologizing for that, nor will I glue a fake smile on my face or fake enthusiasm. LM is a good bullshit detector (with me), and I’d rather him see his mom for who she is rather than think I’m a fraud. Some people might consider their child associating them with Eeyore (or otherwise not being smiles all or most of the time) as a bad thing, but I consider it progress for me since it indicates that I’m becoming more accepting of who I am.
And in case you were wondering, LM said the boy did end up taking the Pokemon card after thinking about it. “He didn’t act excited to get one, but I know he was happy because he’d talked about wanting them before, but said his dad thinks they’re too expensive.” I love how he thinks of others.