4AM Anxiety Attack

So much for a restful night.

I fell asleep pretty quickly–despite feeling jittery as heck and not taking Ambien–but woke up a couple hours later having a really bad anxiety attack.

Obviously the medication stuff was weighing on my mind, since that’s what I dreamed about leading up to waking up. I dreamed of stopping the meds cold turkey and having frequent brain zaps to the point that I couldn’t function. I also dreamed about being “found out”–as in people I know finding my blog and putting 2+2 together (a concern I have, since I’m generally a private person).

When I woke up, I could barely breathe and was nauseous. My heart was racing and felt like it was going to pound out of my chest, and I was trembling. I used my asthma inhaler, but that didn’t help steady my breathing. Got up and walked around the house, drank some water, let the cold air hit my face to try to calm me down, but nothing.

Finally, I remembered I had some Klonopin left over from a couple years ago, so I took one of those and sat back down on my bed and tried a deep breathing exercise the therapist I saw a couple years ago had gone over. About an hour later, it wore off and I eventually went back to sleep. I had a lot of vivid dreams and woke up frequently over the next three hours.

I went ahead and took the Effexor after I got up. I’ll see how it goes and try to keep an open mind about seeing a psychiatrist. Fear of medication < fear of another anxiety attack like that.

The kids are going to the grandparents later this afternoon and will spend the night, so that will definitely take a load off and likely make for a more restful night for sure.


15 thoughts on “4AM Anxiety Attack

  1. cardamone5 says:

    Klonopin is the drug I am trying to wean myself off of, and which I forgot to bring extra of during my trip to my step-grandpa’s funeral last weekend, causing a sleepless night and next day anxiety. I have been on it for 9 years, since I was pregnant with my daughter (I know, not supposed to take while pregnant, but was either that or not have her.) I caution you to wean yourself off of your meds slowly rather than cold turkey. The last time I tried cold turkey, I broke down.


    Liked by 1 person

    • Anxious Mom says:

      Yikes…I took that regularly for a few months a couple years ago and it wasn’t fun tapering off. Do you mean not switch directly from zoloft/wellbutrin to Effexor? The doctor said that should be fine.


  2. Just Plain Ol' Vic says:

    Klonopin is a scary drug, thankfully my wife is not on it anymore. Take advantage of the kids being away, find your emotional center and get some rest.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. As I read this I could so relate to that feeling of fear and digging for my old klonopin which I no longer take but find myself going back to because the panic is so much worse than the hellish withdrawal I went thru to get off of it.
    Don’t you love waking up thinking its morning but then realizing you’ve only been asleep for a couple of hours.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anxious Mom says:

      Yes…lovely how feeling like that suddenly makes those medicine fears go away a little. I do believe I’ll take the drugs over the anxiety attacks/depression and whatever else life throws at me!

      Ugh hate that. My doc prescribed Trazodone to help keep me asleep. It did that, but took forever to kick in though.


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