Bitchfest

Oh well, asshole kid is still an asshole. Just not to Little Man. The boy has told me a few things, including some homophobic and racist comments. The latter caused LM to confront him and almost get into a fight yesterday. LM did not get in trouble, and I’m not sure whether AK did (like, with the principal, I know he was in trouble with the teacher). I told the boy no more Fortnite with AK, not that I needed to tell him that.

There is so much of that shit these days. Too many closeted assholes pre-2016 now feel more emboldened to let that shit loose, and their kids are picking up on it and letting it loose at school. A friend of mine told me that someone in her son’s class told her he was getting sent back to Mexico since Trump was president. Crap like that. I’m sure some of these parents/kids were like that before, but I just get a sense that people are more likely to let it all hang out now. No fear of repercussions, especially not in Redneckville, USA.

On to other things…

I am burned out, more so than normal. My sleep is suffering more than usual, too. I’ve been falling asleep around 1:30ish and waking up at 5:00 a lot over the past week. What the fuck, body? For fuck’s sake, if you’re not gonna fall asleep until late, at least sleep until 6:45. The one night I felt drowsy enough to fall asleep earlyish, my husband insisted on talking until almost 1:00 about fucking politics. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been that pissed at him. Every time I’d roll over on the side my good ear is on (I can’t hear enough out of the other ear to be bothered by anything), he’d tap my shoulder and want me to roll over and talk some more. It’s a miracle there wasn’t a murder that night.

This past week was our easy week. School three days of play practice, one day of soccer practice, two appointments, one field trip, and one fun run. And a soccer game and a concert 4.5 hours away tomorrow. I almost want to cry looking at my calendar for the next two months, and it seems like something keeps getting added every day. Or people want favors or something. And I’m trying to finish the book shit in all that, up my social media presence to help with that (fuck me, aside from sharing personal/funny stuff, I hate all that crap with a passion), and keep up with blog stuff.

[Insert generic whine about anxiety here. I don’t even wanna.]

Now you know that the title of this post wasn’t an exaggeration.

Now for a something funny…I almost ran out of gas yesterday. My car shows the mile range I have left on a tank, and I noticed that I was low…I was left with enough gas to travel ONE MILE. Since I was parked at my in-laws’ house and my husband had his car there, too, AND I noticed it before I left, it was funny as hell. Typical spaz thing for me. My husband drove home and got a can of hurricane gas for me.

(Hurricane gas is gas purchased to fuel a generator during a hurricane. We also have hurricane water, hurricane batteries, and hurricane bread, which is in the freezer. The hurricane snacks have been long gone.)

I’m thinking about trying CBD oil. A friend of mine swears by it. He said it has helped with his anxiety, insomnia, and stomach issues. Plus it’s supposed to help with joint issues. It’s so expensive, though. Has anyone else tried it?

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I’m All Signed Out

Kids are so weird. Baby Girl often changes her name depending on what she’s interested in and wants us to call her that. She has been Charlotte, Wilbur, Marshall, Lucy, Elastigirl…it does not stop. Sometimes she’ll keep the name for days or weeks. (Like the time she wanted to be called “Miguel” and insisted on that in public, which got weird looks.) Not calling her by her preferred name usually results in a meltdown.

She is now heavily interested in signs. It all started out by asking about curve and wet floor signs, looking for them everywhere (she will look in every nook and cranny in smaller restaurants/stories for wet floor signs stashed away), and now it’s a full-blown obsession. Road signs, wet floor signs, etc. Everywhere we go, she points out all of the signs and only wants to talk about signs.

And now she will only eat her food if I do “Road Signs and Indoor Signs Guessing Game.” That means I have to ask her random sign trivia and when she answers correctly, she’ll take a bite of food. If I run out of questions, then she’s done eating. The whole trivia thing has been a deal for the past few months (it reflects the other interests), but good lord. On the plus side, asking about shapes, colors, and the letter certain signs starts with is educational at least. (So is counting when she sees MPH signs and drawing them, for that matter.)

Little Man is ready to lose his shit over that. It is getting annoying, but I guess he forgot how he talked incessantly about Pokemon for weeks on end!

Since she’s into signs now, she has changed her name to reflect that.

“I want to be a  sign. I’m Baby Girl the  ‘No Smoking’ sign.”

The rest of the family has gotten new names, too, and she will only call us by those names. I’m Exit sign, her dad is Yield sign, Little Man is Wet Floor sign, and the dogs are Railroad Crossing signs.

All of her knock-knock and “The chicken crossed the road” type jokes are all related to signs.

Her Christmas list: “All of the road and indoor sign stuffies they make. At least a Curve sign stuffie and a Yield sign stuffie and a No Smoking sign stuffie.”

I tried explaining that there isn’t a demand for such stuffed animals, so the toy manufacturers aren’t producing these for kids, but she thinks I’m full of it. After looking around, I did find some pillows with street signs on them, so I guess we’ll get one if this is what she’s still into in a couple of months. My husband said we could buy her a wet floor sign for Christmas, too. Can you imagine getting a wet floor sign for Christmas?!

File this under “Another thing I never thought I’d be doing/saying as a parent.”

The Girl

My husband had his first week of driving back in to the office full time (mostly — he gets Fridays at home) last Monday. After 8+ years of working from home, this is a big change. He has added 3 hours a day to his schedule with the commute, which sucks, but at least he still has a job. Some of the other work from home folks that lived further out were let go. It’s funny how productive I was last week when he was gone. I can get more done in a few hours by myself than I can get done in two or three days with him being under me.

Baby Girl is having a hard time adjusting to the change, and she was hell to deal with last week. I think that is why she acted up so bad last week, anyway. Typically she doesn’t do well with changes to her routine at all, and this is a big one, so it’s probably safe to assume that caused her behavioral issues. Her meltdowns were worse than ever. One morning in the car, she was screaming at the top of her lungs over something — it was minor, but I can’t remember what — and started kicking the back of my seat as hard as she could and called me a stupid idiot. What the absolute fuck? And the thing is, she feels so bad about it and starts calling herself mean and a bad girl, and then gets more upset because she feels bad about herself. She’ll scream, “I want to be a nice girl” over and over. It’s frustrating as hell, but breaks my heart at the same time.

She had her appointments with the occupational therapist and speech therapist yesterday. The OT does think she has sensory processing issues, but didn’t really elaborate on much. She also noted that she is being in her physical development (motor skills, plus she still can’t get around much on her tricycle and runs a lot like a toddler still). She will start OT in a couple of weeks. The speech therapist also noted some issues she has and she’ll start that in a couple of weeks as well.

They both said that if she had another year before kindergarten, that they felt she would catch up on her own. Just last week, her teacher and the preschool director were saying something about not being sure if she would be ready for kindergarten yet and that she might benefit from another year of preschool if something doesn’t change in the next few months. She’s a very bright kid (the teacher and therapists both commented that she is ahead in a lot of ways academically), but really behind in the other stuff. And then there is the behavioral stuff, and she won’t have an appointment for that until late December.

We have no problem letting her repeat 4K if needed, as long as it won’t be an issue with our state. They will let you sign a waiver to opt out of 5K, but are unclear on whether they will let them go to 5K the following year or make them go straight to first grade. We’ll need to call around and find out more. I don’t want her going straight to first grade. Worst case scenario, I guess, it we would put her in private school for 5K and switch her over to public first grade the following year.

Here Comes The Sun

No more rain! We lucked out — outside of some wind that knocked down branches and power for some people, we weren’t affected by it much. A couple buildings in our town were sorta flooded (like a couple inches inside), but that’s it. We really did luck out, because the towns 10 miles east and northeast of us got over 15 inches. Huge chunks of roads were washed away, buildings super flooded, a few deaths in those areas. Really bad.

Hopefully SC (well, everywhere of course) will luck out the rest of the hurricane season.

On to other things…

We got a new pediatrician for Baby Girl. She’s an NP and absolutely amazing with her. She spent so much time interacting with her and going over things with us. (And now we feel guilty for keeping her with the family PA for so long.) She said she thinks she likely has sensory processing disorder, too, and has some concerns about her development, so she now has referrals to an occupational therapist, speech therapist, and a developmental pediatrician. This will all take a few months, but I’m glad the ball is rolling in the right direction!

I found a new psychiatrist, so yay, no more dealing with the unprofessional office. I had a hard time finding someone (I prefer a female), since so many private practices within a couple of hours from me won’t take insurance anymore, and the ones part of the corporate groups require you to see a PCP within their group. I did find a male doc with fantastic reviews, and he had a cancellation so I was able to see him (before the ER visit last week). He made a great first impression, too. He did agree with the previous psychiatrist about the diagnosis and meds. He said bipolar patients were his favorite, because so many have their meds mismanaged that it affects their quality of life. Interesting.

Little Man has made it through almost a month of school with no issues, outside of a difficult girl in his class. (Picture Angela from The Office.) He started telling her that he can’t hear her when she’s yelling or speaking in a rude tone, and she dialed things down. He told me last week that he’s using positive reinforcement with her. When she acts nice that day, he does something nice for her (like stack her chair or put her book away) to reward her. He’s quite pleased with himself that it’s going so well.

Also, no issues with the bully kid. LM said after the first couple of weeks, he straightened up with the teachers for the most part. Little Man started playing Fortnite with a friend from school a couple weeks ago, and the bully got his username and sent him a friend request. LM asked if he should accept it. I told him it was up to him. I thought maybe the kid wanted to try to be friends, and told him we’d keep a close eye on things if he accepted. He did, and they’ve played online a lot over the past week and have chatted, no issues at all. I’ll continue to monitor that, but hopefully that means the kid has made a 180. We’ll see.

LM’s first few play performances went well. The others got canceled because of the hurricane. The day before LM’s first performance, he did something so bad on stage that absolutely horrified me, but nearly made me pee my pants laughing after he explained what happened.

He was wearing overalls, and I noticed him stuff both hands down the front and start fiddling around with his crotch. It was very obvious, thrusting about. I was thinking, OMFG, what is he doing?! Is he going to be like that creepy guy from Sons of Anarchy? And then this happened:

Basically that without the trench coat. He stuck his finger out the front, which wasn’t zipped. A few minutes later, he stopped. When we got in the car, I asked him what the heck was going on.

“I looked down and saw that I forgot to zip my overalls. I didn’t want anyone to think I was touching myself there, so I tried to be discreet and zip up my pants from the inside, but that was really hard to do!”

I laughed so hard I had tears going down my cheeks. I broke it to him that is EXACTLY what it looked like he was doing for a good five minutes. I also told him that I saw the finger poke out and what it looked like. Thankfully he was able to laugh at himself. I told him from now on, either turn to the side and adjust yourself or just let it be, because no one is really gonna notice a zipper that isn’t up all the way, but they would DEFINITELY notice what he was doing. Little boys!

The Sun Is Green

Husband: “The sun is green.”

Me: “No it isn’t; it’s yellow.”

Husband: “No it’s not, it’s GREEN. Take a look outside, and you can see that it’s green for yourself.”

<checks to make sure I’m not living in a bizarro world where the sun is green now>

Me: I checked, it’s yellow. Why do you keep saying it’s green?”

Husband: I don’t know what your problem is. We have a green sun, and that’s that.

Me: The sun has NEVER been green. And unless “green” means “yellow” now, it’s not green.”

Husband: Hmm…

….

Husband: The sun IS yellow. But you knew what I meant.

Me: No, you said the sun is green. You insisted that the sun is green multiple times.

Husband: But you should have known what I meant. Obviously I don’t think the sun is green.

Me: But you said “green.” Words have meanings, you know.

Husband: Well, sometimes I use words wrong, but you should know what I really mean. Of course I don’t think the sun is green.

<I stroke out>

_____________________________

While we haven’t actually discussed the sun’s color, this example is the root of many of our disagreements, and it drives me nuts! I am not, nor have I ever been, a mind reader.